Some Amusing Letters to Santa

December 23, 2010

A series of letters to Santa from the third grade class at Goessel Elementary School (Marion, Kansas) might just give you the Christmas spirit. The most amusing questions that children asked were why Santa was so fat and why his wife wouldn't help him deliver presents.

Naturally the most asked for items were video games and video game systems. One third-grader even asked for Call of Duty: Black Ops. I hope that Santa does not fulfill that particular request. Below are a few amusing samples:

How is your life with Mrs. Claus? Do you have kids? I am funny and silly and everyone that I know is nice. I want Legos, video games, candy, Call of Duty Black Ops, and a DSi. I will get my cousins an iPhone and my dad a car. We have a white house with blue lights and do not have a chimney. Do the reindeer talk? This year I think I will leave juice for you because I do not want a fat Santa. How did you get fat in the first place? How did you get the job? Thank you for the presents. Your friend,

Luke

Vincent wants a lot. I feel sorry for Santa:

How many hairs would there be if you would shave? I’ve been good but my brothers have not. How about you? Have you been good? I want candy, Bakugan, Legos, DS games, PSP, PS3, Xbox Live, Xbox 360, and a Playstation 3. My friend Cody wants lots of video games. My house is very tall and is white and tan. Go to the garage and my Christmas tree is in our living room. Do you feed your reindeer? I will leave some carrots for you that way you can fit down the chimney. Has your suit ever been a different color than red? Thank you for everything you’ve given me. Your friend,

Vincent

Anton wants video games and asks Santa why he's so fat:

Do you like video games? I live in the country in a house with a brown roof. Santa, how did you get so fat? Get my brother, Jakob, an mp3. I want video games and Legos. I’ve been both naughty and nice this year. Does Rudolph have a bright nose? I will leave you some pop and cookies because you like it. Santa, are you going to ever switch jobs? Does your wife deliver presents with you? Does your sleigh carry magic? Thank you for listening. Your friend,

Anton

You can read the rest of the letters here.

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DorthLous: I love how she plays the "I'm a parent, you're a gamer, you couldn't understand" card... I'm a parent and I find her position despicable...05/23/2013 - 4:16pm

E. Zachary Knight: She didn't address your questions because she doesn't have any answers.05/23/2013 - 3:38pm

Andrew Eisen: I replied to her comment. Maybe in a few weeks I'll get a reply.05/23/2013 - 3:24pm

Thomas Riordan: @Andrew Eisen To what bowling alley does she go that puts sexual images in the faces of 6 year olds?05/23/2013 - 3:17pm

Andrew Eisen: Well, it took a month but Linda Stender finally replied to me... and didn't address a single one of my questions. http://aswlindastender.com/2013/04/23/follow-up-video-games-and-their-effect-on-children/05/23/2013 - 3:13pm

Imautobot: Also, from a tech perspective the PS4 is apparently already winning. http://bgr.com/2013/05/22/xbox-one-vs-playstation-4-specs/05/23/2013 - 3:12pm

Imautobot: Sony's PS4 motto should be "We play games." Microsoft's should be "We play games, when we're not rewinding your tapes."05/23/2013 - 3:11pm

Andrew Eisen: Oh look, Dying Light was just announced For Everything But Wii U. That's 73.05/23/2013 - 2:06pm

james_fudge: Zippy: they said the same thing about Cell. How did that turn out.05/23/2013 - 1:28pm

Andrew Eisen: Need for Speed Rivals is coming out For Everything But Wii U - PS3, 360, PC, PS4 and Xbox One. That brings the grand total up to 72.05/23/2013 - 12:55pm

PHX Corp: http://wiiudaily.com/2013/05/microsoft-is-selling-the-wii-u-better-than-nintendo/ Wii U daily Opinion: Microsoft is selling the Wii U better than Nintendo05/23/2013 - 12:23pm

E. Zachary Knight: Zippy, they very well may be. But that will only last until they are released. At that time, they will be two generations behind.05/23/2013 - 11:14am

ZippyDSMlee: for a good luagh, http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/124288-EA-Exec-Xbox-One-and-PS4-Are-A-Generation-Ahead-Of-PC05/23/2013 - 10:55am

james_fudge: It's about time! I need W805/23/2013 - 10:49am

MaskedPixelante: Looks like Gamepot is more willing to play ball than Square Enix. Wizardry 6+7 and 8 are available on GOG.05/23/2013 - 10:36am

DorthLous: Anybody tried Hiversaire? Thoughts?05/22/2013 - 5:48pm

E. Zachary Knight: New Humble Bundle Weekly Sale. Alan Wake: https://www.humblebundle.com/weekly No Linux or Mac support. :(05/22/2013 - 1:46pm

E. Zachary Knight: Microsoft talks about the lack of backward compatability. You're backwards. http://www.gamasutra.com/view/news/192801/If_youre_backwards_compatible_youre_really_backwards.php05/22/2013 - 1:39pm

E. Zachary Knight: That is absolutely nuts there. As bad an experience XBox Indie Games was, the problems weren't with the self published side of things. Forcing a publisher onto independent studios is not going to help.05/22/2013 - 10:43am

MaskedPixelante: http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2013-05-22-microsoft-wont-let-indies-self-publish-on-xbox-one And the hits just keep on coming.05/22/2013 - 9:20am

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